A double dose of fashion reality from a curvy duo's point of view...
backstory: apparently ne-yo was approached by a young lady who had a desire to be in the music industry as a singer, and a part of his ’sage’ advice to her, was that she should lose weight.
*deep sigh*
i know this beard having closeted psuedo-sex symbol (??) who does not even live next door to cute, with or WITHOUT a hat on, is not talking about ANYBODY’s looks in *any* way… while giving an interview and chewing on gum like a f* cow chews cud. Boy stop… and while I’m at it- How you doing?
Well, not those “exact” words… but close enough! My workload will not allow me to comment on this in the way that I want or need to right now, but trust and believe that I will be coming back to it.
In the meantime take a very good look at my girlfriend Sharon’s post on her blog regarding mass retailers continued recent decisons to downsize or obliterate their plus size lines… some of which have be relegated to online sales only.
Sharon Quinn “The Original Runway Diva” says…
We must put a plan of action in motion together now or this will continue to happen and we will continue to be the punchline of all the jokes unless we flex our financial muscles now and let retailers (and OTHER folks who dare to step) know that we will NO LONGER:
- Give our hard earned dollars to retailers who don’t give a damn about us or our thoughts.
- Shop in stores that offer us unfashionable, boxy clothing that is hugely overpriced and low quality simply because it’s convenient.
- Tolerate artists who verbally assault us on an international level and in public forums…(i.e. WALK OUT and DEMAND YOUR MONEY BACK – should an artist find the need to insult you or your community after you have spent your hard earned dollars to support them!)
I honestly believe that by threatening to keep that 60 Billion bucks in our pockets will make a WHOLE LOTTA folks sit up and listen.
I agree, what are WE (and our $) going to do about it?
I had a very interesting conversation with my mom about a month ago. She revealed to me that some family members were “concerned” that I didn’t have a man and that I rarely seemed to date. The sentiment was that I need to “lower my standards” and “stop being so picky” when it comes to men. Needless to say I was completely taken aback by this revelation.
First of all, did anyone bother to ask what my standards are? How do you know my standards are too high? And if they are, why should I lower them? Oh, I can’t have standards because I’m a big girl? All of these questions came to mind because I’m pretty much the only fat person in my family. I have two sisters who are on the slender side and my brothers, while big guys, are tall and well…men. And we all know it’s okay for them to have a little extra sumthin’, sumthin’. To be fair, I don’t know if their suggestion that I settle is driven more by my size or my age, since I am knocking on 40’s door, but based on previous conversations, I firmly believe it’s rooted in my physical appearance. I’ve always been a little larger than everyone else, however, at 220 lbs and a size 18, this is the largest I’ve ever been and some of my relatives have begun to take notice. There seems to be a general consensus that a plus size woman has limited options when it comes to men and should take whatever she can get.
This couldn’t be further from the truth. Just in case you hadn’t heard, there are many men who prefer plus-size women. Just Google “BBWs & dating.” – the search results speak volumes. And it’s not just the “chubby chasers” who are fans. Don’t forget the equal opportunity daters who just like women in general and don’t mind a few extra pounds or curves. So, why am I still single? Well, to be honest, I haven’t really met anyone worth my time or attention. Do I get approached? Oh, most definitely. Are these men I can envision a future with? Uh…no. Pookey, Man-Man and Rayquan may be a catch to some, but I’m sorry, I actually require a little more from a man than just a penis!
The truth is, it never occurred to me to settle for less than I want or deserve in a mate. I’ve always dated men who were educated, upwardly mobile and quite attractive. While this may be surprising to many, because let’s face it, society would have you believe that any desirable man, would never be interested in a fat chick. Well, don’t be fooled. And don’t underestimate big girls. There are many gorgeous and successful men who appreciate a woman with luscious curves and who are proud to be seen with a beautiful, confident woman of size. Just ask my exes.
YouTube – Alison Hinds – Roll It Gal.
I don’t usually get down with most of the reggae and soca music, but this song i just learned about, and I like it a lot.
It’s my empowerment song of the day, and also about to serve as my birthday tune (which is today)… The lyrics are actually empowering, and I’d post them – but they are in carribean patois, so i’ll just link them.
** NOTE: I apologize to anyone in advance who may be personally offended by my commentary, however I am not an official news source. Nor do I try to be. I am merely commenting on ‘my world plus’ as I see fit, with all the thrills and sometimes ills that it presents. **
While entangled in the webs of the internet last night checking out a few plus related sites/plus model photos and passively looking for inspiration or something to that effect, I came upon a profile for a plus “model” based out of Atlanta.
I’m perplexed as to whether I should mention her name, or even post her pics here for various reasons – so I’ll decide on that by the time I finish this post. While surfing her pics and profile, I was at first intrigued because she definitely was not your average “model” since her curves were on overload, yet she appeared to be pretty fit (tell-tale airbrushing aside). Her measurements (while I question how accurate they were*) were impressive – 5’9” 36DD-32-55 230lb.
However, I couldn’t help but to be taken in by her ultimate dreams and aspirations. Which I will list here as “Magazines I am determined to be in” (direct quote):
Tearsheet
Skin Tones
Straight Stuntin
Stunnaz (*author note: “for distinguished men” is the tagline… I doubt they know what that even means)
Jet (as Beauty of The Week)
As-Is
Assets
Umm… way to set goals for yourself? *smh*
First and foremost, I knew about only 4 of the mags listed there – and only one of them is even remotely something to be proud of (I’ll let you take that as you will). Now granted, I definitely don’t hate on her self-assuredness and confidence level – but any straight & plus model will tell you that if you venture too far off into the nudes and glamour lingerie category it’s very hard to come back.
Additionally what is this to aspire to? You want to be the next Buffie the Body or something? The best mags that video “models” can even begin to aspire to are the cheeky and urban print magazines of the world. And if you are not getting paid (trust me they are not), how much exposure is good exposure in that equation?
When I was growing up, you wanted to be like Iman, or Beverly Johnson, Naomi or Tyra (focusing on color, and placing my size issues aside). Aside from that, it’s already harder as a plus size & black woman to get beyond others and their perceived Venus Hottentot mental comparisions, so why place yourself squarely in the crosshairs?
Challenge the barriers, like Velvet D’Amour and Beth Ditto, or Sharon Quinn and Mia Amber! Being the next Buffie, or KiToy, or Elke the Stallion (check the links, as I cannot make this stuff up), does not put you in line to be the next anything of substance. Just another tip drill that is small in the waist cute in the face (cute is still up for questioning)… but overall you are still just a disgrace.
*I dispute this, because I am about her height (5’8”) similar in shape and my measurements are much higher than that (I actually appear to be smaller than her and I weigh more than she does – *raised brow*). Even with an hourglass figure, she’s clearly presenting a manufactured element to add to her wow factor in the end.
Is Olivier Theyskens Coming Stateside to Helm Halston? — The Cut: New York Magazine’s Fashion Blog.
but i really love theyskens… i especially liked when he worked for rochas. he inspired me, so i shared.
Sharon Quinn: The Original Runway Diva: The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency.
Jill Scott’s new show on HBO. I didn’t get a chance to watch tonight since I was working, but I’ll check it out on demand. I actually met Jill a week before she left for Kenya to begin taping this series. She was very sweet, and I was trying to get her to take on a new skin care regimen for a client that I was working on before she left. She has radiant skin in person!
If you saw the show, let me know your thoughts… or at least let me know you’re reading the blog 
Robin Givhan waxes poetic about how the fashion industry just isn’t dialed in…
“The challenge is to give non-famous women that same respect. For designers to get as excited about the average readers of Essence as they get about Michelle Obama. To hone their skills so that they can cut a dress in a size 14 as expertly — and frequently — as they cut one in a size 6.”
I might cop the leather jacket… i wish it had just a tad bit more adornment, but I can rock it…
Exerpt from the article:
It is an open secret that most women are not size two and they are not six feet tall. And yet, the tiny percentage of the population who conforms to those dimensions seems to be the target of the fashion industry. Rarely do you see fashion that is targeted at the full size woman.
For years the full size woman has been treated as a minority while in fact they have been the majority. Full size women are not only mothers and housewives they are also business women. Trends are shifting and one even sees full size woman models here and there.
It is as if the fashion industry is slowly starting to wake up to the fact that there is a lucrative market for the taking. Not only are they also fashion conscious and sometimes dedicated fashion divas, but the full size woman can look absolutely spectacular in clothing designed for her posture.
